We’re sure the storekeepers will understand: It’s...

We’re sure the storekeepers will understand: It’s Super Bowl week, of course, and we anticipate some vicious tackling, crisp blocking and open-field running. Not on the field--in supermarkets.

Harvey Geller of Tarzana points out that Diet Coke’s 12-pack displays--titled “You Could Win Free Super Bowl Tickets Inside Package!”--invite customers to “just look inside this package for your chance to win.”

And, better yet, the displays also note: “No purchase necessary.”

Back to the Future, Part 4: The Diet Coke folks also seem unclear on the date of Super Bowl XXVII. The display, decorated with a picture of the Rose Bowl, says: “All prizes must be claimed by 2-19-93.”

Bringing people together through garbage: The city of Long Beach, in a letter to residents about its new automated refuse collection program, says that the system “will create a sense of neighborhood unity on collection day.”

Adult-safe: A Target store in Long Beach offers a haven for shoppers with small children, a checkout line with shelves that are marked: “No Candy Displayed in This Lane.”

Good hair day: As part of his campaign against domestic violence, celebrity hairstylist Jose Eber will invite women from local homeless shelters to his Beverly Hills salon for a free cut Feb. 12. Eber, who usually charges $200, calls the Valentine’s Day gift an “Empowering Make-Over.”

At least we don’t have to root for the Rams anymore: Therry Carroll of Upland sent along a map drawn by Mary Kay Cosmetics indicating that, while you were asleep, the Big One gave California a make-over.

Lesson No. 1: Robyn Frandsen noticed that El Camino College’s summer catalogue includes a class, “Help I’m in Debt,” which will reveal among other things the “warning signs of overspending.” Beneath that blurb is a note saying that one way to pay for the classes is to “charge by phone.”

Another way to deal with debt: A scruffy-looking guy spotted at the corner of Topanga Canyon Boulevard and Pacific Coast Highway the other morning was holding a sign that said: “Hell, why lie, I need a beer.”

Of about 20 drivers waiting for the signal to change, no one gave him a cent.

miscelLAny:

The first traffic signal in Los Angeles appeared in 1920 at the corner of Adams Boulevard and Figueroa Street. It was described as behaving “like a cross between a railroad semaphore and an alarm clock.”