Just Give Leaf a Damn Good Coach

Jet receiver Keyshawn Johnson told Bob Glauber of Newsday that he expects Mike Riley, the new San Diego Charger coach and former USC offensive coordinator, to have a positive effect on underachieving Charger quarterback Ryan Leaf.

“I love that guy,” Johnson said of Riley. “When I first got to play for him, I was just someone running around the field in high school and junior college.

“But he taught me how to read coverages, understand what the quarterbacks are doing, why players do different things.

“He helped me become the No. 1 pick from all he did, and he’s going to help Ryan Leaf the same way.”

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Trivia time: Which school holds the NCAA Division I record for consecutive victories in a basketball season?

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Disenchanted: Nick Canepa of the San Diego Union-Tribune writes that he was once hooked on the NBA in the days of Oscar Robertson, Elgin Baylor, Bill Russell and Jerry West. Not anymore.

” . . . The player lockout has meant very little to me. Being that most of the games are unwatchable, and the league is loaded down with undisciplined, uncaring, stinking-rich, fundamentally unsound, dunking, taunting, trash-talking, foul-shot-missing, jump-shot-missing, pot-smoking adolescents who have taken very little time to learn the true beauty of what once was a magnificent game.”

Don’t hold back Nick, tell us what you really think.

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Slandered: In an interview with Playboy magazine, boxer Mike Tyson ripped Wallace Matthews of the New York Post: “[He] called me a ‘rapist recluse.’ I’m not a recluse.”

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Yogi-ism: Ron Rapoport in the Chicago Sun-Times on the demise of the ABL: “As Yogi Berra once said, if people don’t want to go to the games, you can’t stop them.”

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Super sub: Barry Horn in the Dallas Morning News: “Should ESPN’s Lee Corso ever come down with laryngitis, Mel Brooks would be the perfect replacement. He looks like Corso and is a lot funnier.”

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Which is worse? Former New York Jet Coach Walt Michaels: “Everyone has some fear. A man who has no fear belongs in a mental institution. Or on special teams.”

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Game plan: From syndicated columnist Norman Chad: “Taking a page from his coaches, [San Francisco 49er owner] Eddie DeBartolo scripts his first 15 wagers in roulette.”

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No identity: Tom FitzGerald in the San Francisco Chronicle: “One thought on the NBA settlement. It’s hard to imagine Kinder Bologna without Michael Olowokandi, isn’t it?”

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Trivia answer: Nevada Las Vegas, 34, in the 1990-91 season before losing to Duke in NCAA tournament semifinals.

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And finally: Mark O’Meara, who as reigning Masters champion, gets to choose the menu for the April 6 Masters tournament champions dinner.

He said he’ll probably select steak and chicken fajitas.

That seems more appetizing than the menu Scotland’s Sandy Lyle selected in 1989--haggis, a traditional Scottish dish made from the heart, lungs and liver of a sheep, mixed with oatmeal and suet.