Adolescent Boss Can Make Working Life Miserable

You are a credit to your company.

You’re responsible. You’re on time. You’re well-dressed, smart and well-liked. But if your manager behaves like an adolescent, your career may still be hell.

Working for a boss who is locked in emotional adolescence can be one of the most trying challenges of an adult’s life.

Such managers are often insecure, unpredictable and dangerous. For instance, they may feel that a simple suggestion is a challenge to their authority. Or they may ignore proper workplace procedures simply because they can. Worse yet, they may form cliques with co-workers or other managers to carry out agendas that can ensnare unintended victims.

What’s it like to work in this situation? The anecdotes read like postcards from junior high. Here are a couple of peeks inside job hell:

“We had one typical problem with ‘adolescent behavior’ last week,” says a union representative at a large public employee union in California. “An employee was insulted or threatened by a co-worker. All he [the manager] had to do was address the situation by meeting with the person and saying ‘Don’t do that.’

“Ironically, the boss told the employee: ‘Be an adult--deal with it yourself.’ ”

The union representative, who requested anonymity, blames such behavior on insecurities often identified with adolescence.

“They don’t want decisions challenged,” says the union representative. “It’s far too typical. We ended up having a grievance filed and all we were asking for was a meeting with the manager and the two employees. [The manager’s] response was that he had made his decision already.”

Actually, he hadn’t made a decision at all. He dodged responsibility for his employee’s welfare and then he referred to the non-action as a decision.

Managers who continually evade responsibility can make your career hell.

Lisa, an actress and educator who has appeared in numerous commercials and the Disney movie “Wild Horses Must Run Free,” remembers all too well her days with an interior design firm.

As the office manager, she had two bosses, both of whom often ducked responsibility.

“They had a lot of high-powered clients but serious cash-flow problems--consequently I had to cover for them,” Lisa says. “I would be on the phone and they would be mouthing the words ‘I’m not here!’ ”

The building floor plan was designed so that a visitor could step off the elevator directly into the main office, which made for some farcical scenes.

“It got so bad that when the elevator would ding that they would run for their offices, lock the door and be really quiet until they could tell it was OK,” Lisa says. “Really, it was like kids saying, ‘I’ll hide in my room and no one will notice.’ ”

And although she liked her bosses personally and respected their various talents, the work situation was hell.

“I dreaded getting the phone calls asking, ‘Where is my carpet?’ It was horrible,” Lisa says. “My boss never said ‘lie,’ but he was very charming and he could win your allegiance and say, ‘Oh, you’re so good--you’ll figure something out to tell them.’ It was a disappointment when he would do things like that,” Lisa says.

Lisa was fortunate that she had already pursued a career change because, despite the high-powered clients, advancement opportunities were not likely to be part of the equation.

“The only reward for good work was that we kept the account--we pulled it off, and the company could keep going,” Lisa says.

Another constant danger was that a vice president of the company would blame his own shortcomings on his employees. So not only was advancement not a real option--the sheer problem of cash flow prohibited that--but one’s reputation in the industry could be compromised as well.

Even though she knew that the business was not part of her long-term career plans, Lisa wanted the company to do well on a personal level. It was almost like a dysfunctional personal relationship she couldn’t let go of, and Lisa admits to taking Tums and grinding her teeth at night by the time she quit.

Making a change was clearly the right thing for Lisa to do, but she didn’t suspect that she would land in another situation rife with immaturity. This time it was in the academic arena, where she had a managerial staff position at a university in the East. Her position required her to assist the faculty.

Unfortunately, one of the teachers didn’t like the overall boss and attempted to undermine him, while at the same time intimidating those beneath her in the department.

“She actually sent a baggy of dog excrement to her boss,” Lisa says. “I guess it was an attempt to haze him. He never found out who did it. But then she told some of us at happy hour.”

The climate of fear was so great that no one would tell of the incident.

“It was a junior high prank at a major college, but I didn’t feel I could possibly tell. She had power and she could hurt your career.”

So if your career sometimes feels like an exercise in absurdity, you’re not alone. And remember that sometimes the best solution is to move into another job where you are appreciated for your skills, not your ability to cope with foolishness.

And you feel all grown-up again.