LAUGH LINES

For the Books: “New York Sen. Hillary Clinton’s $8-million book deal is drawing a lot of criticism. . . . See, that’s one good thing about George W. Bush--we know he won’t be writing any books. . . .” (Jay Leno)

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The Essential

David Letterman

Top 10 Questions

George W. Bush Asked

President Clinton

10. “What’s the name of that big building shaped like a pentagon?”

9. “Where do you want me to forward your subpoenas?”

8. “Can I buy your ’92 inaugural speech from you?”

7. “Who does a guy have to execute to get a drink around here?”

6. “Lemme get this straight--you won an election without a brother as governor?”

5. “How can I tell [Dick] Cheney to start wearing a shirt to meetings without hurting his feelings?”

4. “Dude, where’s my car?”

3. “In that movie ‘Independence Day,’ did the Martians really blow up the White House?”

2. “Do you think the young lady could stop that until we’re finished talking?”

1. “Which one of these is the Bat phone?”

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